The day is here! Surgery day!  I have been taking all the supplements my surgeon recommended, as well as a detox protocol to help my body after surgery with detoxing from the anesthesia, pain meds and anything icky left over.  I'm nervous and incredibly excited.  Last night, I laid in bed with my daughter as she fell asleep.  I had tears welling up in my eyes because for the first time it's hit me how real life and death is.  What if I don't wake up? What if this is the last night I get to snuggle with my daughter? What if, because of my vanity years ago, I've caused my body to undergo such a drastic survival mechanism as cancer to fight the toxic crap that is sitting in my chest?

I don't want to sound dramatic, but MDS is serious, as is any surgery.  Yesterday, I wrote out letters to my loved ones, just in case I don't make it through this surgery.  I wrote out instructions for my husband on all our banking/financial info, because I'm in charge of all of that, and if I'm gone, he'll be left scrambling to try to find log ins, account numbers, etc.  I truly try to think positive in situations like this, but the reality of how dangerous things could get, is not something I take lightly.

We arrive at the surgery center at 5:00am, and the nurse is there ready to bring me back to get ready.  I tried to be so strong, so my daughter didn't see the fear I was feeling inside, and I gave her a huge hug and kiss.  I kissed and hugged my husband, and then headed back into the surgery center.  I changed into my gown, hair net, compression socks, disposable undies, and booties and headed out to my bed.  The nurse went over my surgery details again, so I could sign off on everything, and she got my IV started.  The anesthesiologist came in to chat with me a bit, go over any meds or supplements I'm taking, and said we'll be starting soon!

I laid there waiting, nervous, excited, and scared all at the same time.  Finally, Dr. Chiu came in and closed off the area with the curtain.  He took before photos, and marked up my chest to map out what he was going to do.  This is it! Time to go!  The nurse, anesthesiologist and Dr. Chiu led me toward the operating room, and they got me laid on the bed.  As the nurse was placing compression wraps on my legs, I didn't even know what hit me, but the next thing I knew, I was waking up hearing, "We're all done! You did fantastic!"

WHAT?! I didn't even blink, and I'm done?!  AWEEEESSSOOMMMEEE! I WOKE UP!!!

I just remember them bringing me my purse, saying that my husband was out waiting for me.  As they were wheeling me out, I had my phone and was texting my family letting them know I was out.  I remember the anesthesiologist laughing, saying I was the only patient he's seen that immediately started texting after surgery.  Now, I'm not one of those compulsive texters ---- I just honestly was so happy that I woke up, and that I'm alive, that I had to let my parents and brother know I made it! Ha ha!

The next few hours were kind of a blur, and I only remember some moments because of the anesthesia still in my system.  But I do know that this recovery was FAR easier than the original implant surgery. I didn't need to take any of the pain meds, and only took a few Tylenol that day.  I looked back through my phone a few days later and couldn't stop laughing at the texts I sent out, and the nonsensical things I typed! HA ha!!

"I groggy" 

"I made it! Super groggy but hey said I wave model patient!" 

"I'm in recovery now. They said I was s good" "I'm hoped up on drugs!"

Seriously?! hahah Don't text while still on anesthesia.

The staff at the surgery center cleaned and packed up my implants to return to me (I'll be sending them to a pathologist), as well as my scar capsule.  Those went right into the refrigerator at home when we got there, and I went right to the couch to start eating! I was starving! Thank GOD the Dr. gave me an anti-nausea patch to wear, so when I was done with surgery, I was just hungry as a bear!


So Saturday morning I went in to the Dr.'s office for my first post-op appointment.  He checked things out and I got to see my new/old breasts for the first time. Not too bad!  I had drains put in to prevent fluid build up, so they just gave me instruction on emptying those and keeping track of how many cc's were filling up before I empty.  Other than that, just keep the compression garment on and take it easy.  Easy enough!

Check these out:

You can kind of see here in the picture (sorry about the quality, it was taken inside using my iPhone 6s), but there is tissue inside the implant as well as other black specs of only God knows what.  THIS is why I'm sending my implants and capsules to pathology. I want to know what is inside that implant and what my body needs to detox from to properly heal.



This one didn't look as questionable as the left, but again it's being sent off as well.

I also took before and after photos of my breasts, just so I had some comparisons. I'll spare you those pics (for now), but I did notice in the photos that my left breast was smaller than the right.  When I weighed my implants here, the left one was lighter than the right, which would explain why it appeared smaller in my chest too.  This along with seeing stuff inside the implant is leading me to believe there was a slow leak, or a faulty valve, allowing fluid to pass inside and out of the implant itself.  Isn't that gross?!  Ugh.

Anyways, I'm healing up nicely and moving forward with detox, healing, and living LIFE!  YES!!!!